MELANCHOLY

Melancholy is a feeling of sadness for No reason. Sometimes I felt sad about not being good enough. I did not feel loved and craved for love, love from the people I love and craved for attention. And I just wanted someone to love me to the level I loved people who did not even deserve my attention. I used to feel numb. I used to feel that I was not good enough and did not deserve love. Loneliness just made me overthink so much that now I can overthink while sitting in a room of hundred people. I am an expert now. 

So just tried to explain my pain, my loneliness and my melancholy in words. 

HERE IS A SHORT FREE-VERSE POEM:

I drowned in the depth of my sadness slowly

This is what they called as melancholy

Something that never I felt before

Consuming me and making me feel lonely

Never have I been so shallow

While feeling so deep

So depressed and so anxious

That I was even sad in my sleep

My insecurities made me much worse 

I could not do anything but weep

Did not show my dark side to anyone

And cried every night under the pillow

It made my eyes swell so much 

Vision being similar to a billow

Never tried to show my weakness

Concealing my emotional side 

Slowly lost my ability to express

The child inside me just died

Remember when you are in vain 

And there is no one standing by your side

He is there to listen and understand your pain

He who is your owner, your guide 

Your journey does not end here 

This might be a making of inner strength and harmony

Like after every storm there is silence

This chaos will make you calm and quiet 

So if you think you are living miserably

There will be an end to your melancholy

This is about what I used to feel. Remember, be it any problem in life, do not lose hope. He, the master of the world will not test you beyond your capability. He said, “I am with those who have patience.” Just be patient and do not lose hope.

YOU WILL FIND PEACE WITHIN YOURSELF.